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If Only…. or I Am…

Where are your thoughts focused? This is an important question because it will help you answer some of the pressing problems you may have in your life.

Our habitual way of thinking is very instrumental when it comes to our results. If our thoughts are on the issues outside of us in the form of “If only…” then we are giving up our personal power to the thing that follows the “If only…” statement.

Think about some of the if only statements that may be rolling around in your head:

“If only, I grew up in a better neighborhood.”

“If only, my family had enough money to send me to college.”

“If only, my wife/husband would stop doing…”

“If only, the government would…”

“If only, my boss would change the way he…”

This is victim language and leaves many people living lives that are not fulfilled and full of sadness. When we rely on things outside of ourselves to change in order for us to be happy, we give way to much power to the thing that will make us happy.

Not only do we give too much power to that entity outside of us to make us happy, that entity can pull the rug out from under our happiness whenever it feels the need to exercise control over us.

This is a scary place to be.

But what happens when we change the “If only…” frame of mind to the “I am…” frame of mind?

When we change the habitual way that we think, we can move from being a victim of circumstance to the master of our own destiny.

What happens when we think in these terms:

“I am happy based on the service I provide and the value that I bring to others.”

“I am physically fit and only eat foods that properly nourish my body and provides the energy that I need to serve others.”

“I am of sound mind and concentrate on the content of the other persons character not the way they look.”

“I am a person of value who constantly looks for ways to better serve the community around me.”

Who has the power in the statements above?

Where does the happiness come from?

Who controls the happiness?

Our happiness will come from living based on our values and controlling the habitual thoughts that we have about ourselves and the world around us.

Lee Milteer’s Habit Busting System is a great resource for habit change that can help you reshape your habitual thoughts and habitual actions to better serve you. Make sure to take a few minutes and check it out!

As Always, Here’s to Your LifetoSuccess,

John Clark

Comments on this entry are closed.

  • Iswaramadhanindaru

    i like this note, thank you sir

  • daru isw

    i like this note, thank you sir