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Anger Management And The Bad Seed
The increased instances of poor anger management
or a lack of impulse control, which is a direct cause of poor anger
management, and children committing horrendous crimes such as murdering
other children, committing school shootings, and killing their parents,
have led some people to wonder if some children just born bad. Are
there really bad seeds, or are these children a product of nurture or
nature, or a combination of both?
There is some evidence that excessive stress during the pregnancy can
cause a higher level of testosterone in hormonal bathing that leads to a
child who is chemically more prone to anger and hostility, there may be
organic brain dysfunctional causes that precipitate children toward such
aggressive, angry, and destructive behavior. Another possible reason
for these tendencies could be severe physical abuse leading to damage of
the frontal lobes of the child's developing brain, which is the area
helping control impulses and reactions.
Children, who experience family aggression, or
those whose needs are neglected by their parents, grow up angry,
thinking that no one cares about them. Excessive stress in their early
lives may cause changes in brain their chemistry. These neglected and
abused children grow up seeing others as objects to be used. Their lack
of early socialization skills and bonding make them into uncaring adults
who feel justified in hurting others. They see the aggressor in the home
as holding all the power and they crave that power for themselves, so
they become aggressive and feel no remorse over forcing their will on
others.
Children and teenagers can be violent, and even deadly. Some young
people turn to violence, because they do not see other ways to endure
what they’re feeling at that moment. They may not understand the
consequences of violent behavior.
These tips may help when you recognize a child who is withdrawing or
exploding over everyday
frustrations:
• Show confidence in his or her ability to develop good anger
management skills, and model positive behaviors.
• Tell your child that everyone experiences anger, talk about the
last time you felt really angry, and share the positive ways of handling
their anger.
• Encourage the child to walk away from their stressors, and spend
some time doing things he or she really likes to do, like sports,
walking the dog, reading a book, etc. A change of scenery or activity
can provide distraction from the source of the anger.
• Teach basic problem solving skills and anger management. When
upsetting things happen, the child who has practiced these skills will
be more likely to think through the consequences and ultimately be
better able to make choices other than violence.
• Look at your own anger management skills. Are you teaching good
skills for children to model?
If none of these approaches work, seek help. Talk to a doctor or
pediatrician. You may decide that your child and family need help from
someone with more mental health training to learn positive to deal with
anger management issues.
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